Coping With Failure (It Happens)

coping with failureIt is definitely a struggle when you have to deal with a failure and it is so easy to begin to think negatively when it happens. We typically do not like to dwell on it but the fact is that eventually each of us finds ourselves coping with failure in one form or the other.

We all make mistakes and life is full of blunders, whether it is failing a test in school, experiencing a social faux pa, disappointing someone we care about, or just making a bad decision, failure can be devastating.

Facing failure, we often forget that others, namely our peers and families, will eventually overlook and forget what happened as they understand that we are all human. The problem is that WE do not forget and tend to think about our mistakes and be down on ourselves much longer than is necessary or productive.

That’s not to say that giving some thought to one’s failures is not necessarily a bad thing. After all, how are you going to improve if you do not examine what it is that you did to cause the mistake in the first place? It is just that prolonged harsh self-criticism is harmful and counterproductive.

Worse, some of us find it hard to pick ourselves up after a fall but that is exactly what we need to do when we are coping with failure… just get back up on your feet and press on.

Coping With Failure

When we fail at anything, even little things in life, it can be uncomfortable, disappointing and maybe even a bit hurtful. So what can you do to get past those little self-created hiccups in life? First, face your mistakes realistically while not blowing things out of proportion. Look for and at the root cause of your mistake, where you went wrong, and acknowledge it. When you know where you goofed up, you can do better the next time.

Myself, I have to admit that at times, I take life and myself excessively seriously and because of that sometimes I have a very hard time coping with failure of ANY sort. Yet it usually does not take long before I can laugh about it and if I did not laugh, at least begin to see the silver lining or the lesson to be learned contained within the mistake. Put your mistake into perspective… laugh about it when you can and move on with the conviction not to repeat the mistake or to do better in the future.

I don’t believe that is possible to have success without some failures along the way and coping with failure is a necessary part of personal growth and learning. Look honestly at where things went wrong, learn from that, and move on without dwelling on your mistake with the confidence that you will only do better the next time.

Andy Wooten M.A. Counseling – A Certified Life Coach In Aspen Colorado

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Photo By Andy Wooten 19 April 2016

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