Happiness Is Not Enough – Cont’d

happiness is not enough contYesterday a reader commented on my posting – Happiness Is Not Enough – she made some very good points… And she was right.

No, not enough. And also not all there is. We have seasons in life and sometimes grief and pain visit us. When we push ourselves to happiness, those life-renewing and affirming seasons of sorrow and grief are often shortchanged and we miss opportunities to learn and grow through them. To everything there is a season… And joy is the best of all. – S.T.

Life is life and the general rule is that you cannot have the good without the bad. As she pointed out there will be periods of loss and sorrow. These periods of loss and sorrow are not always things to fear or shield yourself from or try to cover up and push through with a forced smile. These things must be experienced.

It is in those most challenging moments in life when we have to be strong that we find out just how strong and resilient we are. It is in those moments of loss that we often find the purpose and reasons for things in life, we learn, and we grow from them. Not to mention it is in these periods when we are sometimes able to see the abundant goodness in others who support us or come to our aid.

Bottom line… it’s the crappy things in life (fertilizer if you will) that allows us to grow.

For me though, this is why learning how to be happy and focusing on that is so important. It comes down to your set point preceding an event that will determine how you define, interpret, perceive and ultimately get through it. In other words, the greater your level of happiness, the greater your understanding of the nature of happiness, and to a degree, how happy of a person you are, is what will ultimately give you more power and capacity to “learn as grow” – as my reader pointed out.

When you are happy… when the bad things happen you are less affected; you can see the beauty and purpose in even less than desirable events or situations.

Happiness takes practice, it really does but once the shift occurs internally and being happy becomes your “default state,” even when the not so pleasant things happen in life, the punches are not as bad. They are punches you must take… but you are better equipped to handle them better. That’s all… that is the difference.

Loss and tragedy are an integral part of life and it should never be suggested to “gloss over your experience” when it comes to dealing with your grief or sadness. You need to feel what you feel in order to move on. So yes, happiness is not enough, and happiness is not the only thing, but it is still my belief it is the most important thing we can learn and possess in order to navigate anything that life throws at us.

Andy Wooten M.A. Counseling – Certified Life Coach – Aspen, Colorado

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Photo By Andy Wooten 05 April 2006 – Sierra Blanca, Tx.

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