Life Is About Loss

life is about lossNot my sunniest piece ever, but bear with me as I promise to turn it back towards the positive. In life, we usually don’t get to finish with everything we started with. Life is about loss and learning how to just “deal with it.” However, there are reasons for that.

I have always wanted to know and understand the meaning or secret to life… the answer to the “why are we here?” question. But when it comes right down to it I tend to believe that life is about loss because we sure do experience a lot of that along the way.

Life Is About Loss

We lose our youth, we lose family members, and sometimes we lose jobs. We lose the ones closest to us that we love and quite often, we lose ourselves along the way…

I came to this conclusion sometime around 2005 I think. Recently divorced I had lost a lot in that “process,” and in 2005 I lost my grandfather, Andy Sr. whom was the most influential person in my life not only as a kid but as an adult too. Two years or so of constant and consistent loss it seemed, and even past that… “the hits kept coming.”

Looking back, needless to say, this wasn’t (in some perspectives) the greatest time in my life. If I had to characterize those years, I lived in a perpetual state of asking, “What’s next?”

That is when I figured out that life is about loss and just learning how to soldier on… I believed that was the total sum of it. Life sucks, you are going to experience great losses along the way, and in the end wind up with nothing to show for it really…

Do I still believe that life is about loss? To be honest… yes and no. I believe that as long as we are living, sure, there will be losses in life, and some losses more significant than others, but I do not believe that is where the story ends.

Loss is a very important part of life for not only though losses do we learn how to carry on but loss is essential for no other reason than to make room for other things. Loss is just part of the deal but it is important to experience loss in order to gain “what’s next” and what is next is usually an upgrade.

So maybe life is not about loss as it is more learning how to let go. Every situation and every moment in life is transitory to what is yet to come and we often a great deal of energy resisting this constant ebb and flow in life.

We have the tendency is to desperately attempt to hold onto anything that we think of as good that may be a part of our lives. More than that, we may hold onto these things or attempt to long after the shine has faded and we may know even deep down that it is time to let go. Even if the little voice inside our head may whisper it is time to change or time leave, our attachment, and our fear of detaching and releasing for whatever reason may hold us back.

Loss simply gives us the power to allow. Loss in a sense equals freedom, and that freedom is necessary to be open to the newer things in life. It is as if one were traversing the monkey bars in the playground. You cannot hold on tight and expect to move anywhere. You must let go and reach for the next rung with an open hand. Let go, reach, grasp, move forward, and repeat until you are on the other side.

Life is about loss… well, that is not exactly how I see it now. Loss is a part of life but when it comes down to it, life is about (and always about) moving forward, growing, learning, evolving and discovering what is around the bend.

Loss is only part of the deal, and that’s all that it is… just part of the deal.

Andy Wooten M.A. Counseling – A Certified Life Coach In Aspen Colorado

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Photo by Andy Wooten 27 September 2001 (Andy Wooten Sr. and Andy III)

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