Stop Telling Your Story

stop telling your storyOne reason that people do not move past anything in life is that they insist on telling their story, repeatedly. It’s good to get things off of your chest but there comes a time to stop telling your story and to start taking action instead.

Some now argue that talk therapy has its limitations because if the client keeps telling their story they are also repeatedly living that story. When you keep telling the same story and reliving it, you are not moving on with your life or living your life to its fullest.

But telling your story can be “rewarding” and not in a good way either, as a matter of fact it can become a crutch and maybe even addicting. When you tell other people about all of the bad things that have happened in your life, or are happening right now, people for the most part will tend to feel sorry for you… you get their attention and getting their attention makes you feel important.

If by telling your story you gain the feeling of being important or valuable, guess what you are going to keep doing… There are two problems with this. First, just as in therapy, if you keep telling your story and that is all that you do, you are not doing a damned thing to move past it. Secondly… if you keep telling your story, sure, you get to feel better, but your friends and family are ultimately going to end up drained and may even begin to avoid you altogether. But that might work as now you could have another story to tell, right?

Stop Telling Your Story

Sure, talking to friends, family, and experts about things you have been through can provide both release and relief, but at some point, you will begin to sound like a broken record. Stop telling your story and take that record and just chuck it out the window once and for all!

Stuff happens… talk about it and get it off of your chest but then get over it and move on. Ditch the story and start moving forward by taking action instead.

Stop telling your story and be willing to write a new story if you must. But this time make it a better story by casting yourself as the hero instead of the victim! Never be afraid to reinvent yourself especially when life gives you the rare opportunity to do so.

When you insist on continually telling your story, the real story that you are telling is that you are not in control of your life at all, and that right there IS a story. Stop telling your story, be responsible for your life, take some action, and do whatever it takes to start moving on.

Make a new story…

Andy Wooten M.A. Counseling – Certified Life Coach – Aspen, Colorado

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Photo By Andy Wooten 25 December 2012

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