You Can Be Happy Or You Can Be Right

you can be happy or you can be rightWhen it comes to conflicts or disagreements, how do you handle them? Do you go for the win-win or do you focus on being right? If you focus solely on winning and being right, what is the cost? You can be happy or you can be right but seldom can you be both.

Why do we have to be right all of the time? Why do we insist on struggling to win in order just to make a point about something? Is it a sign of a need for control?

Often the need to be right is based in the ego’s fear of ever being wrong because to our egos the “idea” of being wrong is almost the same as dying or death. The ego ALWAYS wants to be right…

What is wrong with the not knowing if you are right or not? The three most powerful words that I have learned in the past are simply, “I don’t know.” It is not said to imply ignorance or a lack of knowledge, but rather so a lack of attachment to specific answer or opinion. “I don’t know” is very liberating and freeing as it then allows you to be detached from an expected answer or viewpoint. It releases you from any sense of responsibility of “knowing,” it allows you to be open to what is, and takes away any demands or expectations in any situation. It is a form of letting go.

You Can Be Happy Or You Can Be Right

Ask yourself in any conflict that you might find yourself…“Do I want to be happy or do I want to be right?” I bet that nine times out ten if you stop and ask yourself that question you will choose to be happy every time. By taking the time to ask yourself what you want, you will see both the drama being played out and the comedy of trying to control the situation. When you choose to be happy over being right, it will put things more into perspective for you. It isn’t giving up, it isn’t about not caring, it is just allowing yourself to no longer being tied to an ego-driven outcome.

So, the next time you discover yourself so deeply entrenched in the position that you are holding, think about stress and tension it is causing you and think about just letting it go. You might have to start out small on simple subject like which movie to see, or where to go eat with your partner but try letting it go if their point of view differs from yours. After all, which is more important… fighting over having Chinese or BBQ for dinner or having a nice dinner out regardless of what is on the menu?

You can be happy or you can be right – decide to choose being happy over being right and see what positive results you get just from letting go.

It’s your choice.

Andy Wooten M.A. Counseling – A Certified Life Coach In Aspen Colorado

If you enjoyed this article or if it helped you, please consider sharing it!

Photo By Andy Wooten 29 December 2011

Speak Your Mind